Personality Types

I feel I have a legacy of laziness and escapism. Either I don’t feel energy, or if I do, I find it difficult to just completely let go. I feel a control. I feel it is somewhere and has become part of your bio-computer. The mind functions as a computer, and we go on feeding it attitudes. They go on accumulating there and by and by they become deeply ingrained. Personalities can be divided into two categories. One, psychologists call the T-personality, toxic, and the other they call the N personality, nourishing. A toxic personality is always looking at things in a negative way. The whole world view of the toxic personality is depressing, sad. The toxic personality hides in beautiful faces. A perfectionist is a toxic personality. You cannot say that something is wrong in a perfectionist, but the whole idea of being a perfectionist is to find errors, mistakes, loopholes. It is a trick. You cannot find any fault with a man who looks for perfection, but in fact that is not his goal; perfection is a device. He wants to look at loopholes, mistakes, errors, anything that is missing, and this is the best way — to keep a goal of perfection so that he can compare them with the ideal and always condemn. This toxic personality always thinks of that which is not and never looks at that which is, so discontent becomes natural. A toxic personality poisons his own being; not only that — he drips poison. It can be a heritage. If you have lived with people in your childhood who had a negative attitude towards life.... It may be hiding in glowing terms, beautiful language, ideals, heaven, God, religion, the soul; they can use beautiful words, but they are simply trying...and they talk about the other world just to condemn this one. They are not concerned with the other world. They have no interests in saints, but just to prove that others are sinners, they will talk about saints. It is a very morbid attitude. They will say, ‘Become like Jesus.’ They are not interested in Jesus at all. If Jesus were there they would be the last person to go to him, but just to condemn you, this is their device. You cannot become Jesus, so you become a victim. They always condemn you. They create values, moralities, puritan attitudes. They are the moralists, the moralisers; they are the great poisoners of the world. And they are everywhere. These people tend to become teachers, educationalists, professors, vice-chancellors, saints, bishops, popes; they tend to become these things because then they can condemn. They are even ready to sacrifice everything if they are just allowed the joy of condemning others. They are everywhere, hiding in many ways. And they are always doing things for your good, for your own good, so you are defenceless against them. Their heritage is real, big. They have dominated the whole history. These people immediately become dominators. Their very ideology helps them to dominate because they can become condemnators. And they talk in rational terms. Rationalism is also part of the T personality. They are very argumentative...very difficult to defeat them in argumentation. They are never reasonable, but they are always rational. One must know the distinction between a reasonable man and a rational man. A reasonable man is never only rational, because a reasonable man knows by experience that life has both — the rational and the irrational; that life has both — reason and feeling, the mind and the heart. A reasonable man is reasonable. A rational man is never reasonable. He forces logic on life — and logic can be perfect; life can never be. He always looks to the ideal, and he tries to force life to follow the ideal. He never looks into life and the reality of life. His ideals are against life. The second personality, the N personality, the nourishing personality, is totally different. It has no ideals, really. It just looks into life and the reality decides its ideal. It is very reasonable. It is never perfectionistic; it is wholistic but never a perfectionist. And it always looks on the good side of things. The N personality is always hopeful, radiant, adventurous, trusting, not condemnatory. These are the people who become poets, painters, musicians. If an N-type person becomes a saint, then there is a real saint. If a T-type person becomes a saint, there is a false saint, a pseudo-saint. If an N-type person becomes a father, then there is a real father. If an N type person becomes a mother, there is real mothering. A T-type is a pseudo father and a pseudo mother. That is just a trick to exploit the child, to torture, to dominate, possess and to crush the child, to feel powerful by crushing the child. The T-type is in the majority, so you may be right that you are carrying a heritage everybody is. But once you become aware, there is not much of a problem. You can travel from T to N very easily. A few things to remember. If you feel lazy, don’t call it laziness. Listen to your nature; maybe that’s what fits you. That’s what I call a reasonable man. What can you do? If laziness comes to you, then that’s what you have to do. Who are you to decide against it? And how can you win against it? Even in your fight you will be lazy. Who is going to win? You will be constantly defeated, and then you will feel unnecessarily miserable. Be realistic. Listen to your own being. Everybody has his own pace. A few people are very active, rushing; nothing is wrong in it. If they feel good in it, it is good for them. And don’t create any ideals that you have to do this. Don’t have any ‘shoulds’. The ‘should’ creates a sort of neurosis. Then one is obsessed. The ‘should’ is always there, standing and condemning you, and you cannot enjoy anything. Enjoy! Kill the ‘should’ completely and be herenow. Whatsoever you can do, do; whatsoever you cannot do, accept. That is the way you are, and you are here to be yourself, nobody else. By and by you will see that your T is turning into N. You will become nourishing and you will enjoy more, you will love more, and you will become more meditative. In fact, for a lazy person to become meditative is easier than for an active person. That’s why the whole East became lazy — they meditated too much. Meditation is a sort of passivity. An active person feels very restless. Just to sit silent is the most difficult thing. Not to do anything is the most difficult thing to do for an active person. Just enjoy and move as fits your being — no shoulds, no ideals, otherwise they will poison you. Look at life with deep hope. It is really beautiful. Just look at it, and don’t wait for perfection. Don’t think in terms of your enjoying things only when they are perfect; then you will never enjoy. If a T-type person encounters God, he will immediately find some faults in him. That’s why God is hiding...because of T-type people. He reveals himself to the N-type, never to T-types. He reveals only to those who can take nourishment from him — not only that, but to those who can nourish him. So just relax, enjoy, accept, and the problems will disappear. Osho, The Passion For the Impossible

Fear Of Change

Question: "I feel alone, which is good, but I am confused. I don’t know what is happening. Things are changing around inside me so sometimes I feel frightened, sometimes there is a floating feeling."

" It is natural. Whenever you feel frightened, just relax. Accept the fact that fear is there, but don’t do anything about it. Neglect it; don’t pay any attention to it. Watch the body. There should not be any tension in it. If tension doesn’t exist in the body, the fear disappears automatically. Fear makes a certain tense state in the body, to get rooted in it. If the body is relaxed, fear is bound to disappear. A relaxed person cannot be scared. You cannot frighten a relaxed person. Even if fear comes, it will come like a wave...it will not get roots.

Fear coming and going like waves and you remaining untouched by it, is beautiful. When it gets rooted in you and starts growing in you, then it becomes a growth, a cancerous growth. Then it cripples your inner organism.
So whenever you feel frightened, the one thing to look at is that the body should not be tense. Lie down on the floor and relax — relaxation is the antidote for fear — and it will come and go. You simply watch.

That watching should not be of interest — indifferent. One just accepts that it’s okay. The day is hot; what can you do? The body is perspiring...one has to pass through it. The evening is coming close, and a cool breeze will be blowing.... So just watch it and be relaxed.
Once you have the knack of it, and you will have it soon — that if you are relaxed, fear cannot get attached to you, that it comes and goes and leaves you unscarred — then you have the key. And it will come. It will come because the more we change, the more fear will be coming.

Every change creates fear, because every change is putting you into the unfamiliar, into a strange world. If nothing changes and everything remains static, you will never have any fear. That means, if everything is dead, you will not be afraid.
For example, you are sitting down and there is a rock Lying down. There is no problem: you will look at the rock, and everything is okay. Suddenly the rock starts walking; you become frightened. Aliveness! Movement creates fear; and if everything is unmoving, there is no fear.

That’s why people, afraid of getting into fearful situations, arrange a life of no change. Everything remains the same and a person follows a dead routine, completely oblivious that life is a flux. He remains in an island of his own making in which nothing changes. The same room, the same photographs, the same furniture, the same house, the same habits, the same slippers — everything the same. The same brand of cigarettes; even a different brand you won’t like. Between this, amidst this sameness, one feels at ease.

People live almost in their graves. What you call a convenient and comfortable life is nothing but a subtle grave. So when you start changing, when you start on the journey of inner space, when you become an astronaut of the inner space, and everything is changing so fast, every moment is trembling with fear. So more and more fear has to be faced.

Let it be there. By and by you will start enjoying the changes so much that you will be ready at any cost. Change will give you vitality...more aliveness, zest, energy. Then you will not be like a pond...closed from everywhere, not moving. You will become like a river flowing towards the unknown, and towards the ocean where the river becomes lost. "

Osho, Be Realistic: Plan for a Miracle